Try spitting at the computer screen. Your spit will glow rainbow!

Monday, January 29, 2007

currently: filling out an eharmony personality profile



I sneezed TWENTY-FOUR times in A ROW today. A fucking row. It was insane. It was almost like the time I drank a gallon of milk in a minute...via an udder of a young buck. (Bambi's father figure = Yung Buc = a real rapper's name?) Why don't I drink some Purell and chase it with a couple of my trademark sweet berry slushie Tums (tum tum tum TUMS). Now we can sit out on my veranda and watch the geese fuck each other in the ass and remember about the Pudding Seige of '92 and when we were happy. Ho He Ho! Hailey backwards is Yeliah, also known as QUEEN OF THE YETIS. Give me some fucking Laughing Cow cheeses and I will eat them all! I know they are the rich man's Cheez Whiz but why can't my mom stop buying POISON Dranks and get me some fucking mother LOLCOWOL. Goodnight from the fringes of my mind, goodnight from my bones which are infiltrated by the cold.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

your best post in ages. yes, i do read this. what are you up to this weekend?

Anonymous said...

you know they say that a sneeze gives you 1/6 the pleasure of an orgasm ... dang girl.

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ALIVE ! And I have a cut in my bottom lip that is quite persistent.